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Feasts, Fiction, Fall & Football.

Sep 17 2021

What with the endless Covid-19 related restrictions, I hadn’t eaten out in ages. That all changed this past week. I have eaten out twice. Both meals were of a similar ilk. Here are the pictures. As you can see, I am a carnivore at heart. Vegetarians, please avert your gaze.

I also went into London for the first time since 2019. The place was inundated with people. I sought refuge in a bookshop.

Here’s another bookshop I came across. It was a throwback to the bookstores of yesteryear.

The first football match in a long time. Chelsea vs Aston Villa.

Beers drunk after the game.

Autumn has arrived.

The grass is still growing and there is a lot of gardening to catch up on.

Hope you have been reading some good books. Here are two books that I read recently. American Dirt and The Crossing. Click on the links to read my reviews.

Have a good weekend.

It’s That Friday Feeling

Sep 10 2021

The week has flown by, can’t believe it is the weekend already. We’ve had something of an Indian summer here in southern England. It’s over now, but was nice while it lasted.

With the lack of rain, my pond has become covered in toxic green coloured algae again. Looks like something out of Ghost Busters.

Trigga waiting for his afternoon walk.

Another day, another green tea served in my Italian 90′ Panini mug.

I am still reading Razor Girl. Looking forward to finishing it and moving on to my next read, which will be this.

Wednesday was the final day of the Indian summer. It seemed the perfect time to sweat off the cornettos and Haagen-Dazs I’ve been consuming of late. So we went for a run.

I was recently given this piece of gym equipment. It fits perfectly in the corner of the garage.

In other news, I have a new headline for my book, Tomorrow’s World.

The Future Is Here. And It’s Absurd.

Links: Amazon US, Amazon UK.

Have a good weekend

Misanthropic Ramblings

Sep 03 2021

If I had as many interactions with people as I do deer, I would be considered a sociable creature. Take this morning for instance. Was barely out my garden when I stumbled across these three. Fortunately, deer don’t comment on the weather or I’d be sick to death of them by now.

And here are yesterday’s.

And Wednesday’s.

You get the point. Admittedly, some of them are no doubt the same deer. My dog doesn’t chase these deer (roe) if I tell him not to. The muntjack (little deer – invasive species from the Far East) are a different story. Muntjack are like a red flag to a bull for Trigga.

Here is an arboretum I visited last weekend. Note the fencing around the trees. It’s to stop the deer eating them.

Here is a shot of my desk. My summerhouse cum office is proving to be a tranquil working environment. I have written 1.5 books so far this year. Of course rewriting may be necessary.

Currently, I am reading a crime caper by Carl Hiassen, the famous humour author. It is proving to be something of a revelation, having never read any of his books. I think I prefer more subtle humour. It’s laid on a bit thick for me, though I appreciate how easy to read his writing is, and the pacing is impeccable.

Have a good weekend.

Photos, Promotions & Purchases

Aug 27 2021

It’s been a few weeks since I posted photographs of deer. Three roe deer have been making regular appearances near my house of late. Here are two of them.

The buck.

All three together.

It seems that much of the world has been afflicted by extreme heat this summer. However, the UK has escaped this trend for the most part. It has been a disappointing summer in terms of weather, but it has been sunny of late.

What a treat.

I finally took the plunge and purchased a new ironing board cover. Voilà.

Recently, there have been promotions for two of my books. From my experience BookBub is the only worthwhile place to run a promotion with. I had an International (non US) promotion with them for Tomorrow’s World, which went quite well. The other outfits reaped lacklustre results.

BookBub is the gold standard of book promotion. But that doesn’t make their competitors silver and bronze; rather cardboard and asbestos. Perhaps other authors have different experiences. I hear ENT are quite good, and no doubt some of the others are too.

6 Irvine Welsh Novels Reviewed

Aug 20 2021

It has been a non-eventful week, so I’m reverting to my trusted subject that is books. I am an avid fan of Scottish transgressive author Irvine Welsh. Here are 6 Irvine Welsh books that I have read. Click on the links to read my reviews.

Skagboys

Skagboys is a work of Transgressive Fiction whose main focus is many of its characters increasing obsession with heroin.

My Review: Skagboys is the prequel to Trainspotting. Its colourful, mostly young characters hail from the Edinburgh port suburb of Leith. There is the bookish, unambitious …(more)

Glue

Set in the author’s customary stomping ground, this episodic tome (556 pages) is in essence about growing up.

My Review: Glue is about four friends who hail from Scotland’s capital, Edinburgh. It begins with them as infants in the 1970s, and ends at the dawn of the new …(more)

Marabou Stork Nightmares

This is an inventive book, boasting parallel stories and different levels of awareness. It is peppered with stylistic idiosyncrasies.

My Review: Roy Strang narrates this story from the hospital in which he is lying in a coma. It begins in South Africa, where he and his friend Sandy Jamieson are hunting the …(more)

Dead Men’s Trousers

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This work of transgressive fiction is infused with humour. The action takes place in Scotland and America.

My Review: The Trainspotting crew are back for another adventure. These days Mark Renton is a successful manager of DJs. Begbie is a famous artist, living the dream in California …(more)

The Blade Artist

The complex and manipulative protagonist, sordid characters and squalid descriptions will appeal to fans of the transgressive genre.

My Review: Reformed Scottish ex-con Jim Francis (formerly Franco Begbie) is now a successful sculptor living the dream in sunny California with his former prison art therapist …(more)

A Decent Ride

This is one of Welsh’s lighter books. Its seediness, humour and bawdy Leith vernacular will appeal to many.

My Review: Terry ‘Juice’ Lawson is an Edinburgh taxi driver who moonlights as a porn actor and drug fixer. Since losing his virginity at the age ofeleven, he has been obsessed with …(more)

My Trip To Wales & A Surprise From Germany

Aug 13 2021

I went to Wales last week. Like many of you no doubt, it had been a long time since I had travelled so far from home. Here are some pictures from my time away.

The weather was variable, as to be expected considering the location. The fluctuating weather did allow for some good photographs.

The steam train we went on.

It took a scenic route.

Some of the shops did not keep reliable hours.

Anyone else a fan of sea bass?

Eggs benedict – what a great way to kick off the day.

Shortly after returning from Wales I received these in the post from Germany.

The German-language hardback edition of Symbiosis. Symbiose in Deutsch.

8 Palahniuk Novels Reviewed.

Aug 06 2021

Here are eight Chuck Palahniuk books that I have read. Click on the links to read my reviews.

Choke

Choke is in essence a social commentary about our innate craving for attention and the fundamental nature of addiction.

My Review: The protagonist, Victor Mancini, is a sex addict employed at an eighteenth-century historical re-enactment park. Victor attends various sexual addiction support groups, where he …(more)

Damned

Damned is a a light-hearted satire of hell, punctuated with comical details, pop-culture references and Theological irony.

My Review: The protagonist is thirteen-year-old Madison, the daughter of wealthy alternative parents. The privileged Madison studies at an exclusive Swiss boarding school and spends her holidays alternating …(more)

Doomed

After escaping from Hell Madison Spencer (protagonist of Damned) is forced to spend a year languishing on Earth as a ghost.

My Review: Doomed is the sequel to Damned and part two of a proposed Dante inspired trilogy. It sees the return of Damned’s protagonist – the plucky, post-life, plump, periphrastic … (more)

Fight Club

The book’s narrator becomes friends with an anarchist by the name of Tyler Durden. The duo form a fight club.

My Review: The protagonist, who remains nameless, is an insomniac leading a bland corporate existence, investigating accidents for a car company, whose only concern is profit … (more)

Haunted

This series of short stories explore a variety of themes, including the media-obsessed nature of society.

My Review: Haunted is about a group of writers, who have been assembled by the conniving Mr Whittier to attend a writers group. The location of the retreat is in an isolated theatre with … (more)

Invisible Monsters

The book’s premise, the superficial vanity of the beauty industry, is used both to explore the unattractive side of human nature.

My Review: Shannon McFarland is a catwalk model, who is the centre of attention wherever she goes. That is until she ‘accidentally’ blasts her jaw shot off with a gun whilst driving down the highway. Shannon is left …(more)

Rant

Rant challenges our own traditions by demonstrating how we contort our recollection of events in accordance with our desires, motives and beliefs.

My Review: Rant is the oral history of Buster ‘Rant’ Casey, recounted by an array of people including his relations, friends, enemies and lovers. Rant’s childhood companions from the …(more)

Survivor

Survivor is an innovative and erudite social commentary, brimming with satirical observations and irreverent humour.

My Review: Tender Branson, the last survivor of the Creedish Church cult, has hijacked an aeroplane, which is now flying on autopilot. His objective: to dictate his life story onto …(more)

Cafes, Calamities, Catnaps & Creepy Crawlies

Jul 30 2021

It had been a long time since I’d been in a cafe. I guess I’m not alone in that regard.

No sooner had I started on the brush cutting than I discovered the metal plate had buckled. This resulted in a forty minute round trip to the garden tool repair shop.

En route I took to thinking about what it would be like living in rural Alberta when something like this happened. The garden tool shop could be two or three hours away.

Here is a picture of the kebab I had last weekend.

Trigga enjoying a catnap.

Yet another photo of a deer.

One would expect to find a creepy crawly this size in the tropics, not in West Sussex. It is a crane fly I am told, also known as a mosquito hawk. I’m pleased that I didn’t squash it, as they hunt mosquitos.

Currently, I am writing reviews of books I have read recently. They have been good, bad and ugly. Here are some of the good ones. Reviews to follow.

Have a good weekend.

Games, Grub & Gardening Galore

Jul 23 2021

By ‘Games’, I’m referring to The Olympic Games. The opening ceremony is today. Can’t say I’ll be watching. Maybe it’s just me, but there is something unappealing about an Olympics with no spectators.

Synchronised swimming isn’t particularly exciting at the best of times, and without a vociferous crowd in attendance it is tantamount to watching paint dry. Same goes for a lot of other events I’m thinking. However, one suspects a significant proportion of the world’s population will still tune in to see the men’s 100 metres final. I know I will. Wonder who the sprinters to watch are now Bolt and the ‘anti-christ’ Gatlin are gone.

Anyone else a fan of watermelon. There is no more refreshing way to kick off a hot summer’s day.

This proved to be a healthy dinner. Good thing I like the colour green.

Another day, another green tea. If you haven’t seen it before, this is my Italia 90 Panini mug.

Trigga, having his siesta.

What with the all the rain and now sun, the garden has been growing like mad. I got two hours of help last week, but otherwise I’ve been fighting with it alone. Not to complain – gardening is a cathartic activity and good exercise etc.

Admittedly, most of what I do is just cutting stuff. I’ve had neither the time or inclination to create beds brimming with an abundance of colourful flora. Maybe one of these days.

Just when I thought it was all done, I realised I’d forgotten this section. It looks like the Amazon Rainforest pre-Bolsonaro.

Better get it cleared right away before the rain comes.

Fauna, Feasts, Feathers, Fiction & Flora

Jul 16 2021

I’m really getting into this whole alliteration thing. Not sure titles of this ilk are effective in driving traffic to my blog, but c’est la vie. Let’s begin with the fauna. Yes, it’s another photo of a deer. The best to date in my opinion.

Anyone else like vegetable samosa? They’re one of my favourites, and this is coming from a carnivore. Consumed the rest of the Indian takeaway before taking any photos, so this shot of the samosas will have to suffice.

I was surprised to find this gargantuan feather in my garden. There are no birds sporting feathers that big to be found here, unless there’s an ostrich hiding somewhere. I assume it was shed from a passing heron, or was carried in by crows, who have a habit of collecting random things. The trainer is included as a point of comparison.

Here is Trigga inspecting our new bit of garden. It was only sown recently. It has grown quickly what with all the rain there’s been. It’s a bit patchy though and will need some more seed after its first mow.

Of late, I have had the misfortune of reading some rather poor books. However, I am poised to begin this controversial novel. It has received praise and condemnation in equal measure. You’ve probably heard of American Dirt.

Time to baptise the new lawn. Have a good weekend.

AUTHOR GUY PORTMAN'S BLOG

Feasts, Fiction, Fall & Football.

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It’s That Friday Feeling

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Misanthropic Ramblings

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Photos, Promotions & Purchases

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6 Irvine Welsh Novels Reviewed

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My Trip To Wales & A Surprise From Germany

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8 Palahniuk Novels Reviewed.

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Cafes, Calamities, Catnaps & Creepy Crawlies

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Games, Grub & Gardening Galore

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Fauna, Feasts, Feathers, Fiction & Flora

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AUTHOR GUY PORTMAN'S BLOG

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