June | 2018 | Guy Portman's Blog

Writing, World Cup and More Besides

Jun 29 2018

I have been tempted away from my desk on a number of occasions this week. I blame the sunny weather and the World Cup.

It hasn’t rained here in the South of England for days on end, which is unusual. If it doesn’t rain soon my garden will start looking like the Sahel.

Last weekend I formed an ingenious plan to make a small fortune out of the World Cup. This was to be achieved by several cunningly-devised accumulator style bets. I was left seething when the Germans laid waste to my plans by losing to South Korea. I am done with World Cup betting. I said that last World Cup and the one before that.

Work continues on my next book. Tomorrow’s World is a darkly humorous, satirical book of vignettes about the future. Themes include hyper capitalism, virtual reality, extreme celebrity worship, a grotesquely ageing population and an ever-increasing mandatory retirement age. I will be releasing more information in due course.

I am continuing to offer everyone a free copy of my satirical black comedy, Necropolis. Necropolis is the first part in a proposed trilogy featuring punctilious sociopath Dyson Devereux. Click here to claim your Free copy (Mobi, Epub & PDF). Part Two: Sepultura, was released earlier this year.

Click here to see the 82 ratings & reviews for Necropolis on Goodreads.

What is a sociopath to do?

A sociopath can only keep up a façade for so long.

The 10 Books I’ve Read This Year

Jun 22 2018

As is my custom at the halfway point of the year, I am devoting this post to the books that I have read so far in 2018. Well, there is over a week to go until the halfway point, but anyway … Here are the ten books that I have read in 2018. They are presented in the order in which I read them. Click on the links to read my reviews.

Skaboys by Irvine Welsh

Genre: Transgressive Fiction

Skagboys is set in the 1980s against a backdrop of Thatcherism, the rise of dance of music and HIV.

My Review: Skagboys is the prequel to Trainspotting. Its colourful, mostly young characters hail from the Edinburgh port suburb of Leith. There is the bookish …(more)

My Opinion: Excellent

An Ice-Cream War by William Boyd

Genre: Dark Humour

An Ice-Cream War’s motif is the absurdness of war. The book’s grave content is laced with humour of the dark variety.

My Review: After much tension and speculation, World War I begins. The main campaign is contended on the Western Front, but there is also a less well-known offensive in …(more)

My Opinion: Good

The Carrot Man by Theo A. Gerken

Genre: Humour

This existential comedy is replete with jokes. Some are offensive, few are amusing.

My Review: The Carrot Man is a novelette about a manic Swede who is revolted by his new flatmate; an unhygienic, unindustrious, unsociable specimen whom …(more)

My Opinion: Poor

The Trumpassic Period by David Belisle

Genre: Humour?

This politics-meets-palaeontology work purports to be a satire, of the lampooning variety.

My Review: The Trumpassic Period is a rehash of President Trump’s first year in office, but with dinosaurs substituting for the controversial leader and his cohorts …(more)

My Opinion: Sleep-inducing drivel

Last Exit to Brooklyn by Hubert Selby Jr.

Genre: Transgressive Fiction

Last Exit to Brooklyn is a controversial and ground-breaking transgressive work.

My Review: This inter-related collection of six stories are set in 1950s Brooklyn, New York. One revolves around a Benzedrine-scoffing transvestite’s …(more)

My Opinion: Memorable

Vile Bodies by Evelyn Waugh

Genre: Humour/Satire

Vile Bodies is a satirical novel whose primary purpose is satirising decadent 1920s London society.

My Review: Author Adam plans to marry his fiancé Nina Blount, but he does not have enough money to convince his disinterested, aristocratic beau to tie the knot. Every time Adam …(more)

My Opinion: Curious and somewhat dated

Hotel Scarface by Roben Farzad

Genre: Non Fiction

Named after iconic film Scarface, Hotel Scarface captures the zeitgeist of 1980s Miami.

My Review: This is an account of the rise and fall of Hotel Mutiny; a Coconut Grove, Miami-based hotel and club founded in the 1970s. It became the haunt of rising cocaine …(more)

My Opinion: Okay

The Raw Shark Texts by Steven Hall

Genre: General Fiction?

This analytical and abstract book’s motif is mental health. Its contents include drawings and computer code.

My Review:Eric Sanderson is suffering from a form of amnesia called fugue, at least according to his psychologist. Eric is aware that his girlfriend Cleo died whilst …(more)

My Opinion: Pretentious and onerous

Not Exactly Shakespeare by Martin Freznell

Genre: Humour

Not Exactly Shakespeare purports to be the shortest book you’ll ever be forced to pretend to have to read.

My Review: There is not much to like or loath about this meagre and mildly comical offering …(more)

My Opinion: Not enough content to form one

Marabou Stork Nightmares by Irvine Welsh

Genre: Transgressive Fiction

An inventive book, boasting parallel stories and different levels of awareness.

My Review: Roy Strang narrates this story from the hospital in which he is lying in a coma. It begins in South Africa, where he and his friend Sandy Jamieson are …(more)

My Opinion: Bleak and quite good

About me and my darkly humorous writing.

Amazon’s Review Purge

Jun 15 2018

It has been a worrying week for authors, what with Amazon’s ongoing Stalinesque review purge. Many authors have had reviews removed for their books, and some have lost all their reviews. For authors who have spent in many instances years gathering reviews, this is deeply distressing. The #giveourreviewsback hashtag has been trending on Twitter.

Amazon’s review writing rules change periodically. They now forbid anyone connected to the author (i.e. family members) writing a review. In addition they don’t permit review exchange services, and those who want to leave a review have to have spent x amount on the regional Amazon concerned. I think $50. Whilst this is fair enough many authors have complained they are having ‘genuine’ reviews removed.

To date (cue touch wood), I have only had a handful of reviews removed. My concern and many others is that Amazon has now frozen our accounts, meaning we cannot receive reviews in the future. I am suspicious about the absence of new reviews for the first two instalments in my Necropolis trilogy. I am currently awaiting a response from Amazon about this. Fingers crossed it is okay because the alternative does not bear thinking about.

Here is a picture of my dog. Something outside had caught his attention. Either a bird or the Amazon delivery man. As I heard footsteps approaching I told myself, It’s not the Amazon delivery man’s fault.

I hope you are all enjoying the World Cup. I just got this Panini World Cup Italia 90 inspired mug from Sainsbury’s. It is bringing back a lot of childhood memories.

If you are looking for reading recommendations might I suggest you check out the book review section of my blog. You will find 131 of my reviews there.

Tomorrow’s World

Jun 08 2018

Doomsayers have been predicting the death of the novel for years. Recently, author Zadie Smith talked of novel-nausea, and journalist and novelist Will Self has even gone so far as to say that the novel is ‘absolutely doomed’. Whether the novel is set to go the way of the dinosaurs is debateable, but literary ennui does appear to be on the rise. Reasons for this include the digitalisation of print culture, ever increasing pressures on our time and social media.

‘We’re in an era of ever-shortening attention spans. For example, I just checked Twitter 12 times while writing that sentence.’ — Adam Riley, comedian

As for me, I want to write more novels (4 to date) but I also want to experiment with shorter, attention grabbing literary forms, hence my decision to pen a darkly humorous, satirical book of vignettes about the future. It will take the form of short, sardonic scenes that take the reader year by year into a future characterised by manic capitalism, virtual reality, extreme celebrity worship, hyper-branding, a grotesquely ageing population and an ever increasing mandatory retirement age. Tomorrow’s World will be released late this year.

In the interim you might enjoy my satirical black comedy, Necropolis. Click here to sign up to my humorous, monthly book-related newsletter and to claim your free copy. You can unsubscribe at any time. Necropolis is the first part in a proposed trilogy. Part Two: Sepultura, was released earlier this year.

What is a sociopath to do?