2020 | Guy Portman's Blog

The December Dark Fiction Bonanza.

Dec 25 2020

Happy Christmas everyone. I hope Santa brought you everything you wished for. If not don’t worry because I’ve got a present for you. But first I would like to share a picture of my Christmas Cake (Disclaimer: I didn’t make it). By the time you read this, it is probably half eaten.

I have teamed up with my fellow dark fiction authors to offer you a selection of 15 FREE dark fiction books. They include one of mine. The promotion ends on Sunday (27th).

December Dark Fiction Bonanza Link

All you have to do to claim your free book/s is to sign up to the given author’s mailing list. You can unsubscribe at any time. If you are already on my mailing list and want my title, just sign up again. I will remove any duplicates.

Happy Christmas and happy reading.

Port, Pigeons & Pooches.

Dec 18 2020

Christmas is fast encroaching. Perhaps you are the type to get your presents well in advance, or maybe you are more the last minute kind of person. Personally, I like to prepare early. I’m boring that way.

These vintage ports are to be Christmas gifts. They are budget vintage ports, but vintage ports none the less.

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These pigeons poled up on my lawn yesterday morning for breakfast.

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How about this for a vantage point.

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Trigga likes this spot as he stays dry here when it’s raining, and it more often than not is.

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These are all his towels. It seems an insane amount for one dog but it’s muddy out there.

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My desktop computer’s been acting up recently. I also have a MacBook (laptop). However, the constricted keyboard gives me tendonitis. It’s strange because I typed several books on it and was unaffected, but once the condition reared its ugly head there was no going back. The tendonitis returns whenever I revert to the MacBook. It is a bit like malaria in that regard. I just got this new ergonomic keyboard to rectify the matter and my friend has lent me a monitor. This will hopefully prove to be a great short-term solution.

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Is that the time? I best get going, I’ve got a Christmas cake to buy.

Winter Wonderland & Encroaching Christmas

Dec 11 2020

We are approaching Christmas and the end of what has been a wretched year for mankind. For us Brits we have the prospect of a no-deal Brexit to look forward to. So much for Johnson and Gove’s bravado. It appears to have been mere bluster. Things are looking bleak, in the short term at any rate.

As for me, I must confess that I have had a particularly unproductive week. It has consisted of online Christmas shopping, a trip to the clay pigeon school and a lot of day dreaming.

There is something enticing about the meek light of an afternoon winter’s sun.

When I go out for my morning walks, the moon has not yet gone to bed.

It’s misty in the woods when it has been raining.

The other day, I was looking out of my home office’s window when I noticed this remarkable sky.

Enough of the great outdoors. Let’s move on to TV remotes. Frequenters of this blog will be aware that only the other week I got a new ‘waterproof’ remote for my bathroom television. And now look at the state of it:

Might as well have used a non-waterproof one. A replacement is in the post I am told.

What a cozy spot.

I’ve been getting into the Christmas Spirit. It’s goose.

Sunsets, Sunrises & Prizes To Be Won.

Dec 04 2020

The moon made an appearance a little after 15:30 the other day. It’s that time of year.

This was a spectacular sunrise to wake up to on Wednesday morning.

Are you interested in winning a bundle of crime fiction and a new Ereader? If you are a member of BookBub, you are eligible to enter. The books include one of mine. Here is the link:

Win a Bundle of Crime Fiction & Thrillers!

2020 might be the second hottest year ever on record, but it’s pretty chilly here at the moment. Perfect weather to enjoy a latte in front of a twenty quid electric faux fire from Amazon.

Don’t know about you, but I am big fan of pigeon breast salad. Few virtually no carb meals taste as good. Here’s one I prepared earlier.

It had been a while since I ate pancakes.

The dog’s had a few treats too. Here he is poised to tuck into a pig’s ear.

This is the time of year to be merry. It is also the time of year to do pruning. I have pruned my trees by hand which has been incredibly taxing on the forearms.

The leaves have since been swept-up. Have a good weekend.

5 Transgressive Fiction Reading Recommendations

Nov 27 2020

It is back to books this week. Of late I have been immersed in Transgressive Fiction. Here are five transgressive books that I have read recently. Click on the links to read my reviews.

The Devil All The Time

This gothicesque novel is replete with reprehensible rednecks, depraved content and frequent shifts in points of view.

My Review: Willard’s wife has cancer, so he turns to God for help. As her condition worsens, his invocations become increasingly extreme. There are …(more)

Black Hole Town

This aptly named novelette boasts memorable characters, visceral prose and an abundance of effectively employed adjectives.

My Review: Friends Fortz and Goose are degenerate drinkers and drug users. Goose is fed up with his psychotic, pill-popping girlfriend Miley, so he hatches a …(more)

A Decent Ride

This is one of Welsh’s lighter books. Its seediness, humour and bawdy Leith vernacular dialogue will appeal to many.

My Review: Terry ‘Juice’ Lawson is an Edinburgh taxi driver who moonlights as a porn actor and drug fixer. Since losing his virginity at the age of eleven, he has …(more)

Blood Meridian

Set in the 1800’s, Blood Meridian is an episodic book, which is almost unparalleled in its misanthropy and repugnant content.

My Review: ‘The Kid’ is a fourteen-year-old hailing from a Tennessean backwater. Following an ill-fated stint as a conscript in a Mexico-bound militia, he is …(more)

The Rules of Attraction

Published in 1987, this transgressive work adroitly captures the era’s zeitgeist with regards to drugs, music, and above all relationships.

My Review: The book is written in the first person from the perspective primarily of three students – Lauren, Sean and Paul. All are pupils of Camden College, an …(more)

Click here to sign up to my monthly book-related newsletter and to claim your FREE book.

Food, Feasting, Fire & Free Fiction.

Nov 20 2020

We are in the midst of Lockdown #2 here in the UK and fun is in short supply. It’s wet, miserable and gets dark really early. Fortunately, there is still pleasure to be found. It had been a long time since I had scampi and chips.

Here is a Tesco-originating, Italian-themed antipasto I assembled earlier.

News of the birdfeeder has spread like wildfire. There are often multiple tits on the feeder at any given time with more waiting in the wings.

I’ll probably only fill it once a week. Otherwise it is going to become a financial burden.

After weeks of mild weather, there has been a cold spell. It was 1°C this morning.

The first fire of the season.

Presently, there is a KDP free day promotion running for my satirical offering – Tomorrow’s World: Darkly Humorous Tales From The Future. It is the only one of my books exclusive to Amazon. The five day campaign ends tomorrow (Saturday).

1,302 Amazon users downloaded Tomorrow’s World yesterday and it reached #37 Free in Kindle Store in Canada this lunchtime. Whether any of this means anything, only time will tell. Regardless, I am pleased that the book appeals enough for people to download despite the fact that it hasn’t got many reviews. Now I need them to read it.

Links: Amazon US, Amazon UK, Amazon CA, Amazon AU

Have a good weekend.

Writing, Lockdown, Stuff Breaking & A Surprise Visitor.

Nov 13 2020

We’re just over a week into Lockdown here in the UK. Everything is uncertain at the moment.

‘When did the future shift from being a promise to a threat’ – Chuck Palahniuk

As for me, I have penned an initial draft of a dark fiction book similar in format to my latest release, The Gazebo. We’ll see what the beta readers have to say about it, but regardless it (name pending) won’t be released for quite some time yet.

The bicycle is out of action until new parts arrive.

So the dog is making do solely with walks.

When it is not dark and/or raining, this can be a pleasant time of year.

You know how when one thing breaks, everything seems to. The TV remote for the bathroom has packed in. I was familiar with limescale in kettles, but did not know until now that water-based TV remotes suffer from the same affliction. A new one is on the way.

The first mince pies of the season. They won’t be the last.

Anyone else a fan of Moretti?

The surprise visitor frequented my new birdfeeder earlier this week.

It is a great spotted woodpecker.

Fauna, Fireworks, Fiction & Flu.

Nov 06 2020

I finally got around to getting a bird-feeder. Its first visitor was this blue tit.

Everyone likes a free lunch. News has spread quickly and the feeder is now being frequented by coal tits and great tits, in addition to an abundance of blue tits. Photos to follow. I will relish the additional company during Lockdown. The flu’s back and our once great nation is in Lockdown for four weeks.

After a period of ghastly weather, Lockdown has coincided with some sunshine.

A ray of light in a bleak world.

I did manage to get a few fireworks in on Thursday.

This work of Transgressive Fiction is going down a treat.

Have a good weekend.

Topiary, Tidbits & A Treasure Trove

Oct 30 2020

Let’s start with the topiary. This bonsaiesque tree resides outside my front door. It has been looking magnificent this autumn.

The rain has been incessant of late and the garden is saturated. This photo was taken during a brief respite.

Yesterday I got really close to deer. If they knew how much I liked venison, they would probably keep their distance.

The dog isn’t allowed to chase them, much to his chagrin. Here he is enjoying a siesta.

The French might be hapless when it comes to cultural harmony, but when it comes to food … Anyone else like croissants?

Now for the treasure trove. The ‘Scary Fun Books’ bonanza ends tomorrow (Sat 31st). You’ll find one of mine here at the discounted price of 99p/99c.

Scary Fun Books Link

Have a good weekend.

A Scary Fun Book Bonanza

Oct 23 2020

Before I get into the details of the book bonanza, here is a photograph taken in my home office stroke summerhouse. I finally moved in on Monday. So far it is proving to be a new lease of life. The only problem, or benefit, depending on how you look at it, is that there is presently no internet.

Now for the book bonanza. I have teamed up with twenty of my fellow humour authors for a promotion. Scary Fun Books runs from Oct. 19th-31st. The books encompass a number of genres and all tastes are catered for. My title is Tomorrow’s World: Darkly Humorous Tales From The Future. It is presently on offer for the tantalising price of 99c/99p from Amazon only.

SCARY FUN BOOKS LINK

Time to get back to the office. I am hard at work on my latest book (#8). The plan is to finish it in record time.

Have a good weekend.

Archive - 2020

The December Dark Fiction Bonanza.

Like this:

Port, Pigeons & Pooches.

Like this:

Winter Wonderland & Encroaching Christmas

Like this:

Sunsets, Sunrises & Prizes To Be Won.

Like this:

5 Transgressive Fiction Reading Recommendations

Like this:

Food, Feasting, Fire & Free Fiction.

Like this:

Writing, Lockdown, Stuff Breaking & A Surprise Visitor.

Like this:

Fauna, Fireworks, Fiction & Flu.

Like this:

Topiary, Tidbits & A Treasure Trove

Like this:

A Scary Fun Book Bonanza

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Archive - 2020

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