Promotion | Guy Portman's Blog

Emergence Blog Tour

Feb 25 2023

A blog tour for my latest novel is commencing on Monday. If you like darkly humorous crime, you’ll love Emergence.

The Blurb:

There’s no stopping this young sociopath.

Teenager Horatio hates his mother’s boyfriend, and there is nothing his long-suffering single mum or half-sister can do about it. The tension soon boils over into school when he attacks the class bully.

While suspended, Horatio has plenty of time to plot revenge against the man he holds responsible for all his problems. It won’t take the adventurous adolescent long to stumble across a depraved and degrading solution.

Now all he needs to do is keep deceiving the psychiatrist and wait for an opportunity to strike.

This suspenseful story will appeal to aficionados of psychological fiction and darkly humorous crime.

Please consider adding Emergence to your TBR. Emergence Goodreads Link.

My Latest Release – Emergence

Jan 27 2023

I have penned another book. Emergence is being unleashed on the world next Tuesday, Jan. 31st. Emergence is #4 in the Necropolis Series.

Here is the blurb:

There’s no stopping this young sociopath.

Now all he needs to do is keep deceiving the psychiatrist and wait for an opportunity to strike.

This suspenseful story will appeal to aficionados of psychological fiction and darkly humorous crime.

…………………

Emergence is now on Goodreads. And it has already garnered some great reviews. If you are a Goodreads member, please consider adding it to your TBR.

Emergence Goodreads Link

Here are snippets from some of the reviews.

‘I was hooked from the start’

‘Sublime!’

‘Flawless and superbly written. Very highly recommended.’

Have a great weekend.

The Necropolis Series (Launch: Tuesday Aug. 30)

Aug 26 2022

There are only four days to go until the relaunch of the Necropolis Series. #1 Necropolis is being released as a new title. #2 Sepultura and #3 Golgotha have been revamped with new blurbs and brightly coloured covers, which will appeal to aficionados of darkly humorous crime fiction.

Necropolis – Public sector worker Dyson Devereux has just discovered there is a large reward for the capture of a genocidal fugitive. And Dyson knows where to find him..

Sepultura – Dyson’s personal and professional lives are spiralling out of control. It is only a matter of time until the suave public sector employee explodes.

Golgotha – Dyson is in an Italian prison awaiting trial for murder. All he wants is to be back in the UK with his treasured mementos.

‘A veritable masterclass in darkly satirical sociopathic black comedy’ – DLS Reviews

‘… a mordant delight’ – Adam Riley, Comedian

‘I love this type of crime novel where you get to spend quality time inside the head of a killer’ – Felcherman Reviews

Click here to see the 102 ratings and reviews (4.15/5) for #2 in the Necropolis Series on Goodreads. #1 Necropolis will have a new Goodreads page when it is released next week. Have a great weekend.

Guy

Time For A Change.

Oct 22 2021

I started this blog on March 12th, 2012. The first ever post was about my recent trip to Miami – Miami: Day One. For the past nine-and-a-half years, I have written a blog post every Friday without fail, with the exception of one occasion due to technical issues.

The plan was to keep blogging until the end of my days. However, this week I made the decision to take a break. I’ve just had enough. The thing feels stale, stagnant, listless, and of little use in promoting my titles. I have no inclination to try and increase my presence on WordPress, as I feel that my energies could be put to better use elsewhere.

The blog will still be online. As for the book reviews section, I will continue to update this with reviews of books I’ve read. There are currently over 130 reviews. But, until I have a change of heart, or big news to bring you, I will not be writing blog posts.

The plan is get on with other stuff. I have written two books this year. Both of which need editing, and won’t be released for quite some time yet. In other news, The Necropolis Trilogy is poised to be remastered. #1 Necropolis will be removed from sale, rewritten and then put back up as a new title. A new cover may be necessary and a reworded blurb too. Hopefully, parts #2 and #3 just need a bit of work and won’t require uploading as new books. This way, I can keep the sterling reviews, which #1 Necropolis never achieved. Perhaps this was inevitable, as it was only the second book I ever wrote.

This is what I tell myself every morning when I wake up – The world will embrace the new and improved Dyson Devereux. Readers will be engrossed from the beginning and eager to read the entire trilogy.

It’s called positive visualisation. OIympic athletes do it all the time. And I’m talking about the successful ones, not Eddie The Eagle, or that swimmer from The Guinea.

I also have plans to write another two books in the near future. By this time next year, I aim to have twelve books out.

It is time for a reset. I will still be visiting your blogs; the few of you who still visit mine regularly that is.

Have a good weekend.

It’s That Friday Feeling

Sep 10 2021

The week has flown by, can’t believe it is the weekend already. We’ve had something of an Indian summer here in southern England. It’s over now, but was nice while it lasted.

With the lack of rain, my pond has become covered in toxic green coloured algae again. Looks like something out of Ghost Busters.

Trigga waiting for his afternoon walk.

Another day, another green tea served in my Italian 90′ Panini mug.

I am still reading Razor Girl. Looking forward to finishing it and moving on to my next read, which will be this.

Wednesday was the final day of the Indian summer. It seemed the perfect time to sweat off the cornettos and Haagen-Dazs I’ve been consuming of late. So we went for a run.

I was recently given this piece of gym equipment. It fits perfectly in the corner of the garage.

In other news, I have a new headline for my book, Tomorrow’s World.

The Future Is Here. And It’s Absurd.

Links: Amazon US, Amazon UK.

Have a good weekend

Nature, Nourishment, Naps & News.

Jun 04 2021

Let’s start off with the nature. I’m not really a flower person, but here are some from my garden. Hydrangeas, I think.

Not even an Iroquois tracker could get this close.

A slow worm.

My cock pheasant has found a female friend. There are no sour grapes on my part. Well, maybe a little.

The weather’s been hot and sunny of late.

Red isn’t my favourite colour, honestly.

I mentioned ‘Nourishment’ in the title. Not sure a kebab is really nourishment, but anyway here it is.

Dessert.

Trigga having a nap.

Another day, another nap.

Now for the ‘News’. Brace yourselves; I’ve got a new chair.

It has lumbar support, a headrest (albeit one designed for pygmies) & armrests.

The news doesn’t end there. Mangetout is free on Amazon for today and tomorrow only. Please download a copy if you haven’t already.

Links: Amazon US & Amazon UK

Mailing List Misery, Mobiles & More

Mar 26 2021

I finally bit the bullet and got a new iPhone. The one I had was ancient. Looking forward to taking and sharing photos with the new, improved iPhone 12 camera. None to show yet. But hope to have some good ones of Easter Eggs in time for next Friday. Here is the new phone.

For the last seven years or so, author gurus have been extolling the virtues of having a mailing list. Like most writers I have one; well three actually, all very modest in size. With the recent release of my new book, Mangetout, I did the logical thing and contacted my lists to announce the exciting news. I was under the impression that List One is comprised of readers with an interest in crime and/or darkly humorous fiction. Well, it seems I am mistaken and that the list consists of people living in north west London suffering from gluten allergies. I would have had more luck trying to sell them Lear jets than my 99c/99p book.

C’est la vie – time to bring out the big guns and move onto List Two. Now, I’m not sure who is on this list. Perhaps it is people who at school averaged a C in Trigonometry tests. A few of them took the plunge.

That left List Three. This list is reserved for people who prefer poached eggs to scrambled. A couple of them clicked the buy button.

My mailing list has undergone several Stalinesque purges, but evidently still consists mostly of Trotskyites, Capitalists, agitators and the bourgeois. What lessons are there to be learnt from the experience? According to someone I was talking to from the world of business, a mailing list that is not grown organically, ‘… is not worth its weight in manure, let alone gold.’

So, it is out with the giveaways and mailing list boost promos. I am going to try and stick to readers who have signed-up via the links at the back of my books.

In other news, I had a big free book promo for Tomorrow’s World: Darkly Humorous Tales From The Future. It hasn’t achieved much thus far apart from garnering some good reviews and ratings on Amazon.

Have a good weekend.

Amazon Link

‘This book will certainly have you turning the pages to see what happens next …’ – The Daily Squib

Gardening, Griping, Guzzling & German

Mar 19 2021

I just can’t get people to do what I want them to do, when I want them to do it. It’s a real problem; one that I can’t imagine Putin or Xi Jinping have. That’s the griping out of the way. Actually no, there’ll be more later. Now for the guzzling. Earlier this week I made an omelette that only broke very slightly. Give me a round of applause please. Here’s a picture of it:

Anyone else like Indian food? I’ll take your silence as a yes. I had an Indian banquet on Wednesday. What a treat.

Now for the German. Earlier this week, Leipzig-based publisher Festa Verlag published my psychological thriller.

Symbiose retail link

Symbiose means Symbiosis in English. Somebody their end must think Symbiosis is pretty good, as it boasts a fairly hefty price tag. The plan is it sells well and they take some more of my books, and I emigrate to Germany, where I am adulated like David Hasselhoff.

That is a picture of my hedge. I do most of my gardening myself due to the fact I like doing it, and because I’m a cheapskate and don’t want to fork out for a gardener. However, at this time of year I do get help with stuff above ground level, such as this hedge for example. A two-man team turned up with chainsaws for what I assumed from the invoice was going to be a full day of arduous labour. Must have been a little over five minutes into their day that the main man knocked on my summerhouse/office door and informs me, ‘We’re done’. When I went out to inspect, I couldn’t see any difference. I told him, ‘I didn’t get you in to trim my hedge with nail scissors.’ He shook his head and said, ‘D-don’t know what you mean. What do you mean?’ ‘I mean cut it properly, to the height of the top of a man’s head, and I’m not talking the world’s tallest man as it is currently.’ They did it again (see photo). I’m satisfied.

Mangetout has been out a week now. There are seven ratings on Goodreads and they are pretty positive. I’m not saying they’re all waxing lyrical, but some of them are. I’m hoping, no I’m praying, that more will appear on Amazon. There are none on the UK site at the time of writing. There are some on Amazon US though. Have a good weekend.

Mangetout: My New Book Is Out

Mar 12 2021

Mangetout is now on Goodreads and Amazon. It should shortly be appearing on other retailers.

Trouble has a habit of finding some people.

These sharp, shocking and suspenseful stories are a must read.

Mangetout (41k words/2.25 hours) will appeal to all fans of darkly humorous crime. Don’t take my word for it. Check out the reviews that have already appeared on Goodreads, and there are a couple on Amazon US too. Mangetout is only 99p/99c for a limited time only. It is also available as a paperback.

I haven’t told my mailing list, or anyone really yet about my new book being out. That’s not just because I’m shy. I’m hoping a few more reviews might appear, particularly on regional Amazon’s, most pertinently my own (UK). Fingers crossed. So, I’m going to wait a little while longer before getting the loud speaker out.

While waiting for reviews to appear, I’ve been trying to avoid Meghan Markle and inspecting my newly manicured shrubs. They’re looking ready for the Chelsea Flower Show.

Have a good weekend.

Mangetout Links: Amazon US, Amazon UK, Goodreads.

Mangetout: Coming Soon

Mar 05 2021

My eighth book is being unleashed on the world next Thursday (March: 11th). This quick read will appeal to all fans of darkly humorous crime fiction.

Mangetout Goodreads Link

Trouble has a habit of finding some people.

Kitchenhand Deron thinks he’s hit the jackpot when a routine delivery of vegetables turns out to be contraband …

Financier Hamish has got involved in the arms trade and business is good. However, he’s unwittingly made a formidable foe …

Ken’s fed up with the nine-to-five. An illegal venture with girlfriend Laura brings the job satisfaction he craves, but also attention from organised crime …

These sharp, shocking and suspenseful stories are a must read.

In North America mangetout (UK) are known as snow peas. This might make the title seem rather random to North American readers, and the Francophiles amongst them may think it means eat all, and perhaps wonder how this correlates to the picture of a snow pea. C’est la vie, the title is fixed now.

My books are supposed to be aimed primarily at my domestic market anyway. However, the one book I have had traditionally published is being published in Germany (this spring), so I may be proven wrong on that count. But I digress. Mangetout will be available from all retailers, initially at least.

Mangetout Goodreads Link

Have a good weekend.

Category - Promotion

Emergence Blog Tour

Like this:

My Latest Release – Emergence

Like this:

The Necropolis Series (Launch: Tuesday Aug. 30)

Like this:

Time For A Change.

Like this:

It’s That Friday Feeling

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Nature, Nourishment, Naps & News.

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Mailing List Misery, Mobiles & More

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Gardening, Griping, Guzzling & German

Like this:

Mangetout: My New Book Is Out

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Mangetout: Coming Soon

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