Ebooks | Guy Portman's Blog

30 Free Humour Books

Aug 10 2018

Today, I am posting four hours earlier than normal. This is to give you more time to take advantage of this free books offer.

Searching for you next humorous read? Look no further!

I have teamed up with my fellow humour authors to offer you a selection of 30 FREE books, which include one of mine. Click on the link below to discover which one it is. This is a one off opportunity to get many of these books for free. But time is of the essence. The offer ends Saturday morning at 07:50 A.M. GMT. Happy reading.

Click here to claim your free books.

15 Author Quotes about Ebooks

Jul 28 2017

It was not so long ago that some were predicting that the end was nigh for printed books. However, in the UK at least, it is being reported that ebook sales are now declining whilst sales of printed books are on the rise.

The other day I came across this excellent quote by Stephen Fry (see below) about Kindle. This got me thinking about what my fellow authors think about ebooks/ebook readers. On conducting some research I discovered these perceptive and amusing author quotes on the subject. Here are 15 author quotes about ebooks/ebook readers:

Books are no more threatened by Kindle than stairs by elevators. — Stephen Fry

Lovers of print are simply confusing the plate for the food. — Douglas Adams

It seems to me that anyone whose library consists of a Kindle lying on a table is some sort of bloodless nerd. — Penelope Lively

Life without a Kindle is like life without a library nearby. — Franz S. McLaren, Home Lost

Growing up in the digital age, I’m expected to embrace all forms of modern technology with blissful ignorance. Books were always one of few escapes from this, because reading a book means not having to look at another damned glowing screen… — Rebecca McNutt

F@@k them is what I say. I hate those ebooks. They can not be the future. They may well be. I will be dead. I won’t give a s@@t. — Maurice Sendak

I guess you can call me “old fashioned”. I prefer the book with the pages that you can actually turn. Sure, I may have to lick the tip of my fingers so that the pages don’t stick together… — Felicia Johnson

Have they all bought Kindles? I have one, and I use it most nights. I always imagine the books staring and whispering, Traitor! – but come on, I have a lot of free first chapters to get through. — Robin Sloan

Stock complaints about the inherent pleasure of ye olde format are bandied about whenever some new upstart invention comes along. Each moan is nothing more than a little foetus of nostalgia jerking in your gut. — Charlie Brooker

If e-book readers were invented before print books, (petty things such as) the smell of ink would have been some people’s only reason for not abandoning e-books. — Mokokoma Mokhonoana

They’ll get my Kindle when they pry it from my cold dead hands, if my corpse will release it. — Elizabeth Horton-Newton

Electronic books are ideal for people who value the information contained in them, or who have vision problems, or who like to read on the subway, or who do not want other people to see how they are amusing themselves, or who have storage and clutter issues, but they are useless for people who are engaged in an intense, lifelong love affair with books… — Joe Queenan, One for the Books

If you drop a book into the toilet, you can fish it out, dry it off and read that book. But if you drop your Kindle in the toilet, you’re pretty well done. — Stephen King

You don’t see people getting pulled over by the police for reading ebooks on their smartphones. — Jason Merkoski

How do you press a wildflower into the pages of an e-book? — Lewis Buzbee, The Yellow-Lighted Bookshop: A Memoir, a History

The Evolution of Books

Nov 07 2014

At the beginning there were papyrus scrolls. Later came handwritten bound books. With the invention of the printing press in the 15th Century books became accessible to the masses for the first time, changing the course of history.

Today ebooks and online retailers are revolutionising the publishing industry once again. The low costs associated with creating and distributing ebooks has seen a proliferation in the number of books being published.

1960 – 8,100 ISBNs issued.

2013 – 1.4m ISBNs issued.

This is largely due to the number of self-published authors entering a marketplace that was traditionally reserved for authors signed with publishing houses.

(courtesy of gallery hip)

There has also been a marked increase in the number of book genres. Yesterday’s readers would no doubt be surprised to find genres such as Amish Fiction, Steam Punk, and an infestation of Romance sub-genres, including Nascar, Amish (again) and Centaurs. So frequently when online am I accosted by book front covers depicting half-dressed cowboys and period clothed cavorting couples in various states of undress that I am seriously considering having a sick bag dispenser installed at my desk. My reading tastes aside, genre fiction, particularly Romance, are performing well in this new era of publishing. Evidence of this is the fact that female Romance authors have been dominating recent Smashwords self-published bestseller lists.

Amazon has been at the forefront of this publishing revolution. Jeff Bezos, a man who was once described as a ‘hyper-intelligent alien with a tangential interest in human affairs’ founded the company in 1994.

Amazon’s war with publishing is well documented. Most recently its battles with publishing behemoth Hachette has seen Amazon accused of aggressive tactics, including delaying deliveries of Hachette books, halting the sale of others, and displaying banners on their website alongside their books with the words, ‘Similar items at a lower price’, in what could be described as the modern equivalent of the medieval siege. Back in the 15th Century the inventor of the printing press, Johannes Guttenberg, died near penniless due to legal battles over his printer. What will be the fate of today’s publishers? Perhaps they will be forced to flee their plush offices and seek refuge in the ruins of closed bookshops, as Amazon drones darken the skies above. A more likely scenario is that they will find ways to adapt to the rapidly changing marketplace.

Although some major authors have been vociferous in their criticism of Amazon, many less famous authors, including myself (Charles Middleworth & Necropolis), have welcomed the high profits Amazon offer, in addition to their advanced recommendation systems that have proved invaluable in assisting authors to find new readers.

Amazon Versus Publishing

Nov 08 2013

The ongoing battle for dominance of the publishing industry saw Amazon emerge victorious from the ‘Ebook Wars’, its heavily armed Kindles decimating Barnes and Nobles’s woefully under-equipped Nooks. The ‘Pricing Wars’, which included an ambitious offensive by vigilante book retailer Overstock, who implemented an aggressive bestselling titles discount campaign, is now little more than a skirmish after Overstock made a predictable tactical retreat thereby avoiding being annihilated by Amazon.

Amazon’s ambitious empire expansion plans have entailed a campaign to lure customers to switch allegiances to them. The company’s strategy of rolling-out a series of new programs has had the dual purpose of distinguishing themselves from their competitors while crucially keeping Amazon in the media spotlight. Recent innovations include – Kindle First, Kindle Matchbook, Amazon Smile, Day One, Kindle Countdown Deals and Free Kindle Freetime subscriptions.

(Courtesy of www.clker.com)

Kindle First and Kindle Countdown are arguably the two programs that offer the most benefit for readers, authors and publishers alike. Kindle First allows Prime Members the opportunity to download one free ebook per month ahead of an official launch, whilst the Kindle Countdown, which is open to all customers, highlights discounted ebooks, at the same time putting pressure on customers to make quick purchases due to the timer which ticks down the days, hours and minutes until the deal expires. As with Amazon’s Kindle Select offering, publishers are only eligible for inclusion on the condition that the given title is exclusive to the Kindle platform (i.e. the title has been removed from competitors platforms) and is discounted by at least a dollar (£0.62).

Amazon’s approach has no doubt been successful to date, the fact that they control about 75% of the ebook market in the US and Canada pays testimony to this. Amazon is also striving to expand its empire into new markets, particularly Asia, as well as various other territories, including countries like Poland, where ebook sales are expected to increase more than ten times between 2011 and 2016.

However new threats to Amazon’s continuing dominance of the ebook market have emerged in the form of supermarkets. In the UK, Sainsbury’s have declared a discount war against Amazon. Last month Sainsbury’s offered ebook titles from bestselling authors at 99p for periods ranging from one day to an entire month. These ebooks are accessible through Android, Adobe Readers, Kobo devices and Nooks, but crucially not via Amazon’s kindle offerings. Sainsbury’s nemesis Tesco are also getting in on the action, having recently brought out their own-brand tablet, the Hudl (modestly priced at £119). To date the Hudl has been well received by customers and analysts alike.

(Courtesy of www.droid-life.com)

Despite the fact that Amazon have established a position of dominance, the future remains uncertain. It was not so many years ago that Microsoft were in complete ascendency of their market yet now that supremacy is being eroded.

Click here to read my post about Amazon’s Asian expansion.

Amazon’s Domination

Jul 05 2013

Amazon’s aggressive empire expansion shows no sign of abating. An arms race between the major players in the online publishing industry has seen the world ravaged by the ‘Ebook Wars’. Technological advancement and investment has resulted in Amazon’s heavily armed Kindle offerings leaving Barnes and Nobles’s Nook on the brink of annihilation, in a war reminiscent of the carbine rifles versus sharpened bits of coconut conflicts of yesteryear. Barnes and Nobles announced last month that they will stop manufacturing Nooks all together and that they are currently seeking an ally to build them. In the previous fiscal year the Nook lost close to $475m. The continual bombardment also resulted in 20 Barnes and Nobles retail businesses being reduced to dust last year. Amazon currently occupies about two thirds of the US online publishing market and ninety-percent of the UK’s. Analysts argue that Amazon’s updated supersonic multi-attack fighter, the Kindle Fire, is already riding a-mock through the smoking rubble of the online publishing industry.

Tank (Courtesy of www.dragart.com)

The ‘Ebook Wars’ were followed in quick succession by ‘The Pricing Wars’, as Amazon’s enemies battling for survival in the face of a relentless attack, have mimicked their strategy of offering 70% royalties to authors within a certain price category. Kobo, seen by many as the friendly face of online publishing are offering 70% of sales for ebooks between $2.99 and $9.99. Only time will tell if Kobo have any defense for the predicted retaliatory Amazon carpet bombing campaign. It seems doubtful that the friendly face will provide it. Barnes and Nobles’s highest rate for authors is 60%, which might yet prove shrewd in allowing them to slip under the radar, but this strategy offers little defense against the stealth bomber that is KDP Select (An author offers their book for free on Amazon for a limited time as a promotion on condition they remove it from competitors sites).

Of course many have argued that global domination is Amazon’s main objective and that the publishing side is merely a means to an end. Perhaps none have put this as eloquently as @JoeWikert, who Tweeted:

Books are nothing more than roadkill on Amazon’s highway to total retail domination: http://onforb.es/RypySa #TOCcon

Some people have been up-in-arms over the accusation that our sacred books are being used as cannon fodder, others have argued that anything is fair game in war.

Technological advancement has been the deciding factor in global dominance throughout history and this appears to hold true for Amazon, whose complex algorithms and list features, give an arguably more streamlined, user-friendly and informative experience than any of their competitors. Another reason for their success is their sense of community (some claim propaganda) recently bolstered by the capture of Goodreads. For Amazon’s enemies this is a major strategic loss as they will no longer have bases on Goodreads linking them back to their mainland sites. All links will go directly to Amazon HQ.

(Courtesy of en.wikipedia.org)

Goodreads users can expect a considerable reconstruction investment from Amazon, resulting in more complex algorithms that give better book recommendations and an improved interface. However some self-proclaimed whistleblowers are warning users on Goodreads forums to flee and seek refugee status elsewhere, in the face of what they claim is Amazon tyranny, arguing that a take-over will result in a loss of independence. Whether these whistleblowers face extraordinary rendition and detention in some Central Asian Amazon affiliate or become assimilated in a new and improved online environment remains to be seen.

We all have our own opinions about the new world in which we find ourselves, but I am sure that all us book lovers will hope that once the dust settles, a few undamaged bookshops will remain standing, if only for nostalgias sake.

Click here to read Part 2.

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30 Free Humour Books

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15 Author Quotes about Ebooks

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The Evolution of Books

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Amazon Versus Publishing

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Amazon’s Domination

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