Bizarre Books III
This is the final instalment of my Bizarre Books Series. As with Parts 1 & 2, I have added pithy/fictitious comments below each.
For residents of Chernobyl and Fukushima.
They do? So why did my mother always tell me not to talk to them?
For those of us who spreading it on our toast is not enough.
A Pulitzer Prize for Fiction winner this is not.
Do It Yourself Coffins for Pets and People
‘What’s that leaning against the wall?’
‘My DIY coffin.’
‘But you don’t need a DIY coffin, you’re not dead.’
‘Better to get it done early. DIY coffins are pretty tricky to assemble post-mortem.’
Managing a Dental Practice: The Genghis Khan Way
If the client complains behead them. Then impale the head on a pike. Don’t forget to polish their teeth first.
Everything I Know about Women I Learned from My Tractor
Presumably not a lot then.
Step One: Take the saw, hold it to the top of your head, and away you go — SsSsSsSsSs.
Joy? — Needle, thread, skin. Really?
How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack
You mean to tell me that gnomes are not only the height of bad taste, they also attack.
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Click here to read Bizarre Books Part II.