Archive - December 9, 2016

1
Bizarre Books VI

Bizarre Books VI

This week sees the sixth and final instalment of my bizarre books series. As with previous instalments I have added pithy/fictitious comments below each.

If you haven’t done so already sign up to my newsletter to claim your FREE copy of my satirical black comedy, Necropolis. Further details at bottom of post.

And now for the 11 bizarre books:
 

Dancing with Cats

dancing-with-cats

A sure way to attract the attention of the men in white coats.

 

Hog Manure Management

hog-manure

If you like hogs and manure this is the book for you. If not you might want to consider a different title.

 

What About Christian Rock?

christian-rock
What about it? No, do not press play.
 

25 Placenta Recipes

placenta-recipes
Finally! I have been growing so tired of plain boiled placentas.
 

People Who Don’t Know They’re Dead

dead

Otherwise known as ghosts.

 

When Will Jesus Bring The Pork Chops?

pork-chops

Don’t hold your breath. Jesus was Jewish, and Jews do not generally eat pork chops, or bring pork chops for that matter.

 

Cards As Weapons

cards-as-weapons

Using cards as throwing stars can be very useful when you are poised to lose money on a card game.

 

Semenology: The Semen Bartender’s Handbook

semenology

Let this book be a warning to all those who treat bartenders badly.

 

Mommy, Why is There a Server in the House?server

Mommy: ‘Since daddy left I have been feeling very lonely, and…’

 

Is It a Sin to Eat a Chocolate Bar? 

chocolate-bar
No, not if it is an organic, gluten-free, fair trade, sustainable farming WholeFoods chocolate bar.
 

Round Ireland with a fridge

round-ireland

Author: ‘If I knew it was going to be this difficult, I would have brought a suitcase instead.’

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Sign up to my newsletter and get a FREE copy of my satirical black comedy Necropolis.

Click here to see the 43 reviews & ratings for Necropolis on Goodreads.

Copyright © 2015. Guyportman's Blog

%d bloggers like this: