April | 2021 | Guy Portman's Blog

Pizzas, Pheasants & Projects

Apr 30 2021

I’ve had a short break from the writing and have been concentrating on gardening. It has taken a Sisyphean effort to get the garden in shape. Ominously, the grass is growing and it seems I’ll need to get back out there soon. I’m not complaining really. Gardening is a cathartic activity and good exercise.

Carbohydrates are a must after toiling in the garden.

Today’s game is called spot the pheasant. Here are three photos, each of which contains a pheasant I came across this week. Can you spot them?

That last one was so well camouflaged, I nearly stepped on it.

Anyone else a fan of Asahi?

Here is a picture of my dog next to a molehill, defiling my immaculate lawn.

Yet more deer.

My current read is a transgressive work peppered with dark humour. Irvine Welsh (AKA ‘The Transgressive Messiah’) is a master of dialogue.

I’m in a quandary now. What should I do first – read, or flatten that molehill? … Eeny, meeny, miny, moe …

Food, Footwear, Features & Flymows.

Apr 23 2021

Had fish and chips for the first time in ages the other day. The calamari (see onion ring looking things below) wasn’t up to much, but the rest was good.

I have been having a break from the office and getting stuff done outside. One task was uncovering this water feature which had become completely overgrown. Can you see the robin?

A glass of wine after a hard day in the garden.

The dog out enjoying the sun and the newly manicured lawn.

Unfortunately, while I was in the process of cutting the lawn I turned the hover mower upside down. I won’t be doing that again in a hurry. It had to be taken into a gardening machinery repair shop. It was far from the only mower in need of some repairs. The line of mowers outside the shop was nearly as long as the queue outside the hairdresser’s at the end of Lockdown.

Earlier this week I went on a shopping trip. Like many of you no doubt, it had been a long time since I went into a ‘non-essential’ shop.

I have not turned into Imelda Marcos; I just happened to go into two footwear apparel stores.

Right, time to get back to the gardening. Have a good weekend.

Fauna, Fiction, Flora & Freedom.

Apr 16 2021

First up it is the fauna. You guessed it, more deer. They were captured through my new iPhone lens at close range.

My Transgressive fiction fix.

I have just started reading in earnest again. Five new book reviews will be appearing in the book review section of this blog imminently. Not sure if that is of any interest to anyone other than myself, but I digress … I took this picture yesterday afternoon immediately prior to going for a jog.

And this one first thing in the morning when I took my dog out for his walk.

Lockdown is gradually easing here in the UK. On Wednesday, I went to the pub for the first time in forever. It was a strange sensation drinking out of a pint glass, as opposed to a bottle. Hadn’t been out for so long that I’d forgotten how tedious people can be. They have reminded me.

Even a cyncial creature such as myself is not immune to the joys of spring.

Got a lot of gardening to do and best get started. Over and out.

More Of The Same

Apr 09 2021

Earlier this week, I was surprised on looking out of the kitchen window to see that winter had suddenly returned. It was sleeting and there was ice on the ground and on my freshly manicured shrubs.

Another day, another deer. I can’t stop running into them. It seems every time I leave the house they are there.

The dog enjoying a drink from the water feature.

What a splendid morning. Despite being half asleep, I couldn’t resist taking a photo.

A book, green tea and Maltesers equals an agreeable combination.

If you follow my blog, you’ve probably seen pictures of kebabs on it before. Here’s another.

What a healthy breakfast this was. Oranges, watermelon and green tea.

Last week, I posted a photo of a pheasant. This week I have a picture of four. Came across them in my neighbour’s garden yesterday. They were having their afternoon tea. I was watching them for quite a while. Now I understand where the term ‘pecking order’ comes from.

Have a good weekend.

Weather, Wildlife, Woods & Wonts

Apr 02 2021

I’ve been taking advantage of the amazing weather we’ve had here (it’s not going to last) and getting outdoors as much as possible. Have combined this activity with taking photos on my new iPhone. I woke up to find this cock pheasant in my garden earlier in the week.

There is an abundance of roe deer near my house at the moment. I’m running into them on a daily basis.

Even a cynical creature such as myself is not immune to the joys of spring.

Anyone else a fan of Cobra? It was designed specifically to be drunk with curry, as it is non-gassy. I like it – be it with curry, or on its own.

Here’s some fragmented salmon fillets and asparagus I prepared earlier.

The dog enjoying a spot of sunbathing.

It is well documented that peoples’ habits have changed during Lockdown. I thought I’d do a lot more reading, but for some reason of late I’ve been struggling with Fiction and only interested in reading the news and sports-related articles. However, Cormac McCarthy has steered me back onto the straight and narrow. This is my current read.