Bizarre Books V

Here are 10 more bizarre books. As with previous instalments, I have added pithy/fictitious comments below each.


It’s Not Going To Get Any Better When You Grow Up


Truer words were never spoken.


Mommy, Why is There a Server in the House?server

Mommy: ‘Since daddy left I have been feeling very lonely, and…’

 Reusing Old Graves


Step One: Turf out the occupier…


Mommy, Is It A Sin To Be Fat?


Kid:  ‘Mommy, is it a sin to be fat?’

Mommy: ‘It depends how fat.’


Outwitting Squirrels


Strategy One: Cover your bird feeder’s pole with glue.


How to Talk to Your Cat About Evolution


Talking to your cat about evolution is no different from talking to some Americans in the Midwest about evolution, i.e. futile.


Natural Harvest: A collection of semen-based recipes


That caramel pudding on the front cover is enough to put one off semen-based recipes for life.


How to Hold a Crocodile


First clasp the crocodile firmly with both hands. No, not by the jaws! … Snap … OW! HELP!


Castration Celebration


Wow, yeah! Castration celebrations are the best fun ever, but the blood loss is quite off-putting. And I am starting to feel rather faint.


Why Cats Paint


Why cats paint? Boredom mostly. Playing with balls of string and toying with mice can only keep them entertained so long.


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