Humour | Guy Portman's Blog

Bizarre Books III

Sep 30 2016

This is the final instalment of my Bizarre Books Series. As with Parts 1 & 2, I have added pithy/fictitious comments below each.

The New Radiation Recipe Book

radiation

For residents of Chernobyl and Fukushima.

Strangers Have The Best Candy

strangers

They do? So why did my mother always tell me not to talk to them?

The Book of Marmalade

marmalade

For those of us who spreading it on our toast is not enough.

I Can Has Cheezburger?

cheezburger

A Pulitzer Prize for Fiction winner this is not.

Do It Yourself Coffins for Pets and People

coffin

‘What’s that leaning against the wall?’

‘My DIY coffin.’

‘But you don’t need a DIY coffin, you’re not dead.’

‘Better to get it done early. DIY coffins are pretty tricky to assemble post-mortem.’

Managing a Dental Practice: The Genghis Khan Way

dental

If the client complains behead them. Then impale the head on a pike. Don’t forget to polish their teeth first.

Everything I Know about Women I Learned from My Tractor

tractor

Presumably not a lot then.

The Do It Yourself Lobotomy

lobotomy

Step One: Take the saw, hold it to the top of your head, and away you go — SsSsSsSsSs.

The Joy of Uncircumcising!

uncircumcising

Joy? — Needle, thread, skin. Really?

How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack

gnome

You mean to tell me that gnomes are not only the height of bad taste, they also attack.

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Click here to read Bizarre Books Part II.

9 Twitter Types

Sep 16 2016

Back in 2012 when I was a Twitter neophyte I wrote a series of satirical posts about the tweeting habits of the various species that inhabit Twitter. Today sees a return to the subject.

Aims & Objectives: To observe and document the tweeting habits of 9 Twitter species.

#Hyperactive #Hashtagger (Perquam strennus)
Incessant tweeters who can be distinguished from other species of the voluminous variety by the ubiquitous #. Nine #’s have been recorded in a single tweet.

Convivial Communicator (Amica Garrulus)
These social creatures calls are audible throughout their waking hours. They typically comprise RTs’, conversational tweets and on occasion self-promotion.

Continual Commentator (Semper Nuntius)
Tweets are nearly always in the form of a statement, rarely part of a conversation, and more often than not contain opinion. It was with a heavy heart that I observed a Semper Nuntius specimen I had first come across back in 2012 still giving daily updates about their television watching itinerary.

Harmonious Helper (Concordi adiutor)
An enthusiastic and contented species that rarely tweets at a rate of more than 10 tweets per hour. They are known to provide detailed instructional information for the benefit of the herd.

Hate Hawker (Auctor odio)
These spite-filled animals vitriol tends to be directed at a particular minority group. In this observer’s opinion Auctor odio would be more readily accepted were they to mix things up with less fervent messages, such as the contents of their sandwich at lunch.

Mundane Messenger (Nuntius mundane)
Nuntius mundane calls consist of random information tweeted throughout its waking hours.

Don’t you just love it when the kettle boils faster than you thought it would — sent from Iphone

Irritating Interloper (Vexo tertius)
Vexo Tertius is a flurry tweeter, who utilises statements and excessive capitalisation. They are prone to using the words I/Me/My (regional variations may apply).

Grammar Goons (Grammatica maculat)
im ready bt mi computer bout dead innit need 2 find mi charga bt ima take it t2 mi sista haus lolz

The prevalence of such tweets is a concern for the future of the English language.

Positivity Purveyor (Inspiratori Novitatis)
Also known as Didactic Dispatchers, these relentlessly optimistic creatures are often well received by other species.

You can’t change what has already happened, so don’t waste your time thinking about it. Move on, let go, and get over it. — It all gets rather earnest for this specimen’s taste.

@GuyPortman

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Absurd Literary-Related Trivia

Sep 09 2016

This week’s post is devoted to 13 absurd literary-related facts. Here goes:

Pile of Books

In 1931 the governor of Hunan, China banned Alice in Wonderland because he believed animals should not be using human language.

None of the 3 best-known tales of the Arabian Nights are contained in the Arabian Nights. Aladdin, Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves, and the Seven Voyages of Sinbad the Sailor were all later additions.

Victor T. Cheney is the author of Castration: The Advantages and the Disadvantages.

Winnie-the-Pooh was banned from a Polish playground because ‘he’s a half-naked hermaphrodite.’

Winnie

Danielle Steel is one of the world’s best-selling living authors. She has sold over 800 million books.

The Romance literary genre has 36 sub genres.

Dr. Seuss book Green Eggs and Ham uses only 50 different words.

Aristophanes’s play Assemblywoman contains the longest word in Greek. It is the name of a fictional food dish, and it has 171 letters. Here it is: Lopadotemachoselachogaleokranioleipsanodrimhypotrimmatosilphioparaomelitokatakechymenokichlepikossyphophattoperisteralektryonoptekephalliokigklopeleiolagoiosiraiobaphetraganopterygon.

ELIYZABETH YANNE STRONG-ANDERSON is the author of Birth Control Is Sinful in the Christian Marriages and Also Robbing God of Priesthood. Every letter in the book capitalised.

According to the American Library Association the Harry Potter series are the most frequently challenged books in America. Some religious parents argue that it promotes witchcraft.

Harry Potter

In Russia Winnie-the-Pooh is on an official list of banned ‘extremist’ material. This is because a senior official was found to own a picture of Pooh clad in swastika-adorned clothes.

Punk Literature (related to punk subculture) has 13 established sub genres. They are: Cyberpunk, Steampunk, Dieselpunk, Biopunk, Bugpunk, Transistorpunk, Nanopunk, Decopunk, Atompunk, Teslapunk, Clockpunk, Splatterpunk & Mythpunk…

50 Shades of Grey is Britain’s best-selling book of all time.

A person who reads 50 Shades of Grey has no advantage over one who can’t read. — Author Guy Portman

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I am the author of 3 books. More to follow.

Bizarre Books II

Aug 26 2016

Here is Part II of my Bizarre Books Series. As with Part 1 I have added pithy/fictitious comments below each.

If God Loves Me Why Can’t I Get My Locker Open

God Locker

Because you forgot the key.

How to Disappear Completely and Never Be Found

Dissapear

Would you trust the author to make you disappear when he can’t spell disappear?

How to Abandon Ship

Abandon Ship

Brimming with helpful tips from Argentine sailors.

Is God In Your Bedroom?

God Bedroom

Well he’s not behind the door or in the wardrobe.

Extreme Ironing

Extreme Ironing

I don’t know about you, but I need to learn how to iron a shirt with the creases in the right places before attempting any extreme ironing.

Hitler: Neither Vegetarian Nor Animal Lover

Hitler

When in his countryside residence, Berghof, Hitler would march around the grounds munching on schnitzels whilst ranting at any livestock he came across with non Aryan characteristics. ‘Unter tier. Nationalsozialistische Deutsche Arbeiterpartei verboten unter tier…’

How To Sharpen Pencils

Pencils

Insert pencil into sharpener and rotate. Repeat until pencil is sharp.

The Missionary Position: Mother Teresa in Theory and Practice

Mother Theresa

Publishing Company CEO: ‘Are you the jackass who agreed to publish this book?’

Employee: ‘Err yes … I’m sorry, I didn’t notice that the title could be deemed offensive to some.’

Publishing Company CEO: ‘The Vatican has declared us to be heretics. You’re finished here. Clear your desk!’

We Never Went To The Moon

Moon

Author: ‘Do you believe NASA of the USA ever set foot on the moon in and after 1969 or do you doubt it?’

‘I can honestly say I’ve never given it any thought. On another subject did you use WordArt to design your front cover? … You did didn’t you.’

Collectible Spoons of the 3rd Reich

Spoons Reich

Not interested. I only collect 3rd Reich forks.

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If Authors Were Desserts IV

Jul 08 2016

This week we return to the subject of authors and the desserts that in my opinion their writing corresponds to. Here are 8 authors and their corresponding desserts.

Leo Tolstoy Tolstoy

Iconic Russian writer Tolstoy is best-remembered for his opuses Anna Karenina and War And Peace.

Corresponding dessert: Heavy Cake

Heavy Cake (Courtesy of Pudsy You Like)

Rationale: Heavy Cake is dense and requires a lot of chewing, but it tastes good.

Anne Rice Rice

The Vampire Chronicles creator is one of the best-selling writers in recent American history.

Corresponding dessert: Jelly

Jelly (Courtesy of Reddit)

Rationale: Right-minded adults steer clear of this puerile dessert.

William S. Burroughs WilliamBurroughs

The Beat author’s later works utilise a non-linear style.

Corresponding dessert: Upside-Down Cake

Upside Down (Courtesy of Zahlicious)

Rationale: Upside-down it might be, but this cake has many tasty ingredients.

Jude Deveraux

Some of this prolific American writer’s historical romances feature paranormal themes and time travel.

Corresponding dessert: Fudge Cake

Fudge (Courtesy of Gastronomy Domine)

Rationale: To make this dessert all you have to do is get a load of fudge and bung some chocolate on top.

Norman Mailer Mailer

Cultural criticism, controversy and obscenity were hallmarks of this volatile and violent author.

Corresponding dessert: Fruitcake

Fruit Cake (Courtesy of Food.com)

Rationale: Self-explanatory

Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

Themes in Solzhenitsyn’s writing include gulags, political oppression and cancer.

Corresponding dessert: Black Bun

Black Bun (Courtesy of Baking For Britain)

Rationale: Many people would no doubt prefer a dessert with brighter colours, but not me.

Stephen King

This master of horror and suspense is adored the World over.

Corresponding dessert: Devil’s Food Cake

Devil's (Courtesy of Always Foodie)

Rationale: The Devil’s voice is sweet to hear. And his cake tastes pretty good too.

Sidney Sheldon

Chick lit/Thriller author Sheldon is the one of the best-selling authors of all time.

Corresponding dessert: Wafer

Wafer (Courtesy of Bar Bakers)

Rationale: With their primary ingredient being air, wafers won’t satisfy one’s hunger.

Click here to read Part III

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My novels include the satirical black comedy, Necropolis.

13 Bizarre Books

Jun 17 2016

I always knew there were some bizarre books out there, but I was not aware quite how bizarre until researching this post. Here are 13 books that I consider to be bizarre. I have added pithy comments/fictitious dialogue below each.

Gadsby: A Lipogram Novel

Gadsby2

This 50,000+ word lipogram novel claims not to use the letter e.

How many e’s can you spot on the front cover?

Highlights in the History of Concrete

Concrete

If you’re going to go to the trouble of writing a book about the history of concrete, you might as well tell the whole story.

Sexual Analysis of Dickens’ Props

Dickens Props

I always knew that chair in Oliver Twist had sexual connotations, but no one would listen.

The Big Book Of Lesbian Horse Stories

Lesbian Horse

One Amazon reviewer claims that The Big Book Of Lesbian Horse Stories is merely a normal sized book of lesbian horse stories.

Latawnya, the Naughty Horse, Learns to Say “No” to Drugs

Horse

This is how I imagine Latawnya the Naughty Horse learns how to say ‘No’ to drugs.

Someone walks into Latawnya’s stable holding some drugs.

Person: ‘Hi Latawnya you naughty horse, would you like some drugs?’

Latawnya: ‘Neighhhh.’

‘Let’s try that again shall we. Would you like some drugs?’

‘Neighhhh.’

‘Would you like some drugs?’

‘Neighhhno.’

Latawyna has learnt to say no to drugs. Have you?

Castration: The Advantages and the Disadvantages

Castration

You mean to say there are disadvantages.

How to Speak Cat: The Essential Primer of Cat Language

Speak Cat

Purr whilst rubbing against someone if you want something, arch your back and hiss if you are angry, meow for everything else.

Anybody Can Be Cool– But Awesome Takes Practice

Cool

Oh, awesome takes practice! That explains why I’ve been stuck on cool for so long.

How to Avoid Huge Ships

Ships

Don’t go on cruises or swim in harbours.

Why Not Eat Insects?

Insects

Why not indeed!

How Green Were the Nazis?: Nature, Environment, and Nation in the Third Reich

Green Nazis

The Nazis may have killed millions of people, but when it came to recycling…

Dating for Under a Dollar: 301 Ideas

Dollar Dating

Go to McDonald’s with your date and order a grilled onion cheddar burger from the dollar menu, then pull out 99c and plead until they let you off the 1c. Now cut the burger in 2 and give her/him half, but with all the onions.

Date: ‘All the onions? That’s so kind. Are you sure?’

You: ‘Yes I’m sure. Now eat them before I change my mind.’

Does GOD Ever Speak through CATS?

God Cats

Cat: ‘Meow! Meow! Purr, purr, meow, hiss! MEOW! MEOW!’

Person: ‘Are you sure God? We already have 10 Commandments, do we really need an 11th?’

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Authors as Desserts III

Jun 10 2016

This week we return to the topic of authors and the desserts that in my opinion their writing corresponds to. Here are 8 authors and their corresponding desserts.

Fyodor Dostoyevsky

Dostoyevsky

Reading the iconic Russian author’s books is rewarding, but challenging.

Corresponding dessert: Gooey Butter Cake

Butter Cake

(Courtesy of Its Good To Be The Cook)

Rationale: Gooey butter cake may be delicious, but it is incredibly dense and requires a lot of chewing.

L. Ron Hubbard

Hubbard

The Scientology founder wrote numerous Sci-Fi and psychotherapy books.

Corresponding dessert: Waffle

(Courtesy of Heritage Radio Network)

Rationale: The content of Scientology’s doctrine.

Virginia Woolf

Virginia Woolf

Woolf favoured observations and interior monologue over plot. Themes in her writing include suicide.

Corresponding dessert: Depression Cake

Depression Cake

(Courtesy of Pinterest)

Rationale: Depression cake might look like a normal cake, but with little or no butter, eggs or milk it isn’t particularly appetising.

Irvine Welsh

Irvine Welsh

Themes in this legendary Scottish transgressive author’s writing include drugs and poverty.

Corresponding dessert: Deep-Fried Mars Bar

Deep Mars

(Courtesy of The Daily Mail)

Rationale: These treats might not be soft on the eye, and they are probably bad for you, but they taste good.

Guy Portman

Guy Portman

You may not have heard of Guy Portman, but you can take his word for it that he’s a talented author.

Corresponding dessert: Dark Chocolate Truffles with Clementine Zest

Truffles

(Courtesy of My Tartelette)

Rationale: The zest is this exquisite delight’s pièce de résistance. It is surprising that this dessert is not more popular.

Yukio Mishima

Mishima

Mishima was a staunch nationalist, and Japan’s most famous ever author.

Corresponding dessert: Daifuku (大福)

Daifuku

(Courtesy of Jap Pop)

Rationale: Daifuku is a traditional Japanese dessert that some Westerners enjoy.

Bret Easton Ellis

Easton-Ellis

Easton Ellis is a master of social commentary. Much of his writing features vapid, soulless characters.

Corresponding dessert: Lemon Sorbet

lemon

(Courtesy of Dishmaps)

Rationale: This cold, astringent dessert isn’t for everyone. I rather like it.

Nora Roberts

Roberts

Nora Roberts is one of the best-selling Romance authors of all time.

Corresponding dessert: Summer Pudding

Summer Pudding

(Courtesy of Home Farmer)

Rationale: The mere sight of this pink extravagance makes me feel quite queasy.

Authors as Desserts II

May 20 2016

2 weeks ago I wrote a blog post about authors and the desserts that in my opinion they/their writing corresponds to. Here is Part II.

Chuck Palahniuk

ChuckPalahniuk

Palahniuk is a controversial, transgressive author whose writing is not for the fainthearted.

Corresponding dessert: Dirt Cake

Dirt cake

(Courtesy of Visions of Sugar Plum)

Rationale: This aptly named dessert is created by combining unusual, and some might argue unpalatable ingredients, including Oreo cookies, cream cheese and Gummy Worms.

George Orwell

GeorgeOrwell

Orwell was an iconic British author with socialist tendencies.

Corresponding dessert: Bread and Butter Pudding

bread and butter

(Courtesy of BBC Good Food)

Rationale: This simple, traditional British fare is popular with the masses.

Jackie Collins

Collins

Jackie Collins is one of the best-selling Romance authors of all time.

Corresponding dessert: Black Forest Gâteau

Black Forest Gateau

(Courtesy of Wikipedia)

Rationale: This decadent dessert leaves one feeling nauseous.

Haruki Murakami

Murakami

Murakami is Japan’s most famous contemporary writer.

Corresponding dessert: Matcha (green tea) Ice Cream

Green Tea

(Courtesy of Youtube)

Rationale: Westerners have enthusiastically embraced this distinctly Oriental flavour, presented in a familiar form.

Danielle Steele

Steele

Corresponding dessert: Cupcake

Cup Cake

(Courtesy of Esciencelog)

Rationale: A dollop of icing fails to disguise what is a meagre offering.

C. S. Lewis

C. S. Lewis

The creator of The Chronicles of Narnia was a devout Christian.

Corresponding dessert: Hot Cross Bread and Butter Pudding

hot-cross-bun

(Courtesy of Tesco)

Rationale: This variation on the hot cross bun is ideal fare to mark the end of Lent.

Bram Stoker

Stoker

Irish author Bram Stoker is best remembered for his Gothic novel Dracula.

Corresponding dessert: Red Velvet Slaughter Cake

Red Velvet

(Courtesy of Huffington Post)

Rationale: Self-explanatory

Vladimir Nabokov

Nabokov

The intellectual Russian born Nabokov utilised an ornate prose style.

Corresponding dessert: Deconstructed S’more

Deconstructed Smores

(Courtesy of OC Foodies)

Rationale: This sophisticated, deconstructed extravagance contains caramelised vanilla marshmallow, soft salted caramel and chocolate-coated cereal garnishes.

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Click here for Part III.

Bizarre Book Trivia

May 13 2016

Yesterday whilst whiling away some time on the internet I discovered some bizarre book trivia, which I thought might make a good foundation for a blog post. Here goes:

Most Bizarre Book Ever: BIRTH CONTROL IS SINFUL IN THE CHRISTIAN MARRIAGES and Also ROBBING GOD OF PRIESTHOOD CHILDREN!! by ELIYZABETH YANNE STRONG-ANDERSON.

WorstBook

I was planning to read it, but considered the price (£20.95) prohibitive. The reason for me choosing it (the title is too long to repeat) is because of Michael N. Marcus’s review in his book Stinkers:

Every letter in book capitalised
Ridden with grammatical errors
Ludicrous subject matter
Excessive price tag
Neurotic nature of its author

Most Offensive Book Title Ever: Helping The Retarded To Know God by H. R. Hahn & W. H. Raasch.

Retarded

I imagine this book wasn’t welcomed with open arms even when it was published back in 1969. As for the question How does one help the retarded to know God? As no one to the best of my knowledge has ever known God, I can only assume it’s a challenge.

Book genres: Have you noticed how many genres and sub genres are around these days. Take Punk literature (related to punk subculture). There are 13 sub genres, in addition a host of tenuous ones. Punk’s official sub genres are: Cyberpunk, Steampunk, Dieselpunk, Biopunk, Bugpunk, Transistorpunk, Nanopunk, Decopunk, Atompunk, Teslapunk, Clockpunk, Splatterpunk & Mythpunk…

Here is an imaginary conversation:

Do you enjoy reading?
Yeah.
Me too. Which genres do you like?
Primarily Dieselpunk and Biopunk with a smattering of Transistorpunk.

According to wiki the Romance genre has 36 sub genres. Every man/woman to his/her tastes, but for me reading with 1 hand whilst holding a sick bucket with the other isn’t much fun.

heart

A person who reads 50 Shades of Grey has no advantage over one who can’t read. — Guy Portman

The infestation of erotica/erotic romance titles means that it is extremely difficult for authors to come up with novel ideas, but I have one — Romeo & Juliet, the Asphyxiation Erotica version.

Juliet: O Romeo, Romeo! wherefore art thou Romeo?
Romeo: Ghuahh! Ghuahh!
Juliet: O’ there art thou with a plastic bag thrust over thy head.

Fans of zoophilia-themed, BBW, paranormal shapeshifter romances might be interested in Hedging His Bets by Celia Kyle & Mina Carter. It is touted as the book that makes hedgehogs sexy.

Hedge

Bad-boy Blake Carlisle is a big, badass biker with a secret — he’s a werehedgehog. It is obvious that Blake and Honey are meant to be together — because he loves rubenesque beauties and she loves hedgehogs .

Here’s an extract: Plopping down on the floor, she opened the cage and lifted each of them out. She rolled around on the ground making yipping noises, mimicking them to the best of her ability, and just playing with the cute little things. … Who needed a man when she had hedgies?

My 2014 – An Overview

Jan 02 2015

Happy New Year

This week I look back on my 2014. It takes the form of concise extracts from my diary. This might seem a rather narcissistic thing to do, but hopefully some of you might find the entries mildly amusing and/or be interested in the links to the book reviews/blog posts/YouTube video.

January
Wednesday 1st – Have I ever had a less memorable New Year’s?

Monday 27th – Read and reviewed Post Office by Charles Bukowski. What a great book.

Friday 31st – It’s Tax Deadline Day – &#%!@?£*@%

February

Monday 3rd – February is the most desolate of all the months.

Wednesday 5th – Won £250 on a scratch card.

Tuesday 11th – Plumbing disaster – Water pouring through kitchen ceiling.

March

Friday 7th – Today I published the 8th instalment of my Bizarre Author Death Series. With the benefit of hindsight this seems like overkill.

Thursday 20th – Ladurée café Harrods – Ceylon tea and an assortment of macaroons.

Wednesday 26th – Is redemption merely an illusion?

April

Saturday 19th – What’s with all these gluten free Easter eggs? Are they for people who haven’t punished themselves enough over Lent?

Monday 21st – My first WholeFoods experience. I will devote a blog post to the subject.

Thursday 24th – Necropolis launch day.

Friday 25th – 13 Necropolis’ sold in 1 hour on Amazon.eu website. Could I be the next J.K. Rowling?

Wednesday 30th – Amazon Sales Report – It appears I am not on my way to becoming the next J.K. Rowling quite yet.

May

Saturday 3rd – I eat 3 WholeFoods caramel slice things.

Tuesday 6th – Nike Town – This assortment of multi-coloured trainers are far too flamboyant for me.

Saturday 12th – Suffering after yesterday’s Marylebone/Baker Street pub crawl (x12 pubs).

June

Wednesday 4th – The Gym – Holding my breath whilst deadlifting results in excruciating exertion headaches. (Takes several weeks to recover).

Tuesday 10th – Novella shopping spree in Waterstones.

Thursday 12th – World Cup begins.

Tuesday 24th – World Cup ends in humiliation for England at hands of Costa Rica.

July

Monday 7th – After much wheezing and spluttering my washing machine takes its last breath.

Tuesday 8th – Finished reading The Old Man and The Sea by Ernest Hemingway.

Wednesday 9th – Hope deserted this launderette a long time ago.

Thursday 17th – Still thinking about The Old Man and The Sea.

Sunday 20th – Catacombs tour of Brompton Cemetery.

August

Monday 5th – The Gym – I am getting really good at these leg presses; I must be getting close to the World record. Oh maybe not – Ronnie Coleman did x8 reps of 1.043 tons.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gmyXXuW8oiA

Friday 22nd – Publish my blog post – My Top 5 Most Disturbing Books Ever – (This will prove to be my most popular blog post ever).

September

Thursday 4th – The Dinner Party – I’ve added too much water to the couscous, this is a catastrophe.

Friday 5th – My weekly blog post – 10 Famous Banned Books.

Saturday 20th – Dinner – Homemade gyoza, highly recommended.

October

Tuesday 9th – Visit Recoleta Cemetery in Buenos Aires.

Tuesday 14th – Dinner – Pleased to be eating something other than steak for a change. A chicken and pigeon combo – delicious.

Wednesday 15th – Santiago del Estero – Northern Argentina – How can it be 40C on a spring day?

Sunday 26th – Go to NFL game between Atlanta Falcons and Detroit Giants at Wembley. I don’t even know the rules. Eat a MacDonald’s, a TGI Friday’s & 3 donuts before 1pm.

Monday 27th – Finish reading and reviewing my first Ballard novel – High-Rise.

November

Monday 10th – Another day another gym mishap – Squashed under bench press, have to cry out for assistance. How embarrassing.

Friday 14th – My weekly blog post – 7 Famous Drug Addicted Authors.

Wednesday 19th – Finish reading and reviewing The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath.

December

Thursday 11th – Necropolis selling well on Amazon.com this week.

Saturday 13th – See my first Selfie Stick (Narcissist Stick) in West End.

Friday 26th – Spend half the day playing Modern Warfare on the PS4. Is this what a mid life crisis looks like?

Saturday 27th – Passport please be in the filing cabinet. NOOOOO.

Wednesday 31st – 23:59 – In Japan at Shinto temple waiting for the bells to toll for New Year.

Tag - Humour

Bizarre Books III

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Absurd Literary-Related Trivia

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Bizarre Books II

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If Authors Were Desserts IV

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13 Bizarre Books

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Authors as Desserts III

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Authors as Desserts II

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Bizarre Book Trivia

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My 2014 – An Overview

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Tag - Humour

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