Twitter (part 2)

(This blog post is a continuation from last week’s.  I include the first three sections for those who did not read it).


The evolution of Twitter since its creation in 2006 has been unprecedented in the history of the Universe.  Twitter is currently inhabited by approximately 140 million creatures (though it is suspected that some are robotic).  This study examines the role of two of Twitter’s many species.

Aims & Objectives

i).  To observe, document & compare the tweeting habits of two species.

ii). Use the results to draw conclusions on the given species prospects for further evolutionary progress.


One hundred tweets from two specimens from each species were analysed over a five day period.  On each day a different hourly time frame was evaluated.  (Note: In instances where not enough tweets were present, the team worked backwards in chronological order until the twenty tweet target was achieved).

The two species are:

Continual Commentator (Semper Nuntius) & Convivial Communicator (Amica Garrulus)

The Continual Commentator

Social Orientation: solitary.

Habitat: swamps

Diet: foraging omnivore.

Behaviour: Continual Commentators tweet primarily in the evenings, after completing their foraging activities for the day.  It is not unusual for an individual specimen to tweet sporadically at other times.  Their tweeting call can be recognised by the fact it is nearly always in the form of a statement and not part of a conversation.  Responses to their tweets have only rarely been recorded in the wild.  Continual Commentator tweets are generally made up of observations.  These often contain opinion.

The Convivial Communicator

Social Orientation: small groups.

Habitat: ranging from savannah to wooded areas.

Diet: Herbivorous (mostly bulbs, roots and fruit).

Behaviour: The Convivial Communicator is a social tweeter, whose tweeting call is audible throughout its waking hours.  Its tweeting call can be distinguished in part by the lengthy pause between each uttering.  Tweets generally take the form of RTs’, conversational tweets and on occasion self- promotion.  Convivial Communicator tweets very rarely contain facts, quotes, criticism or judgement.

Tweeting Data


The Continual Commentator

i). The repetitive, tedious, negative and often judgemental nature of Continual Commentators tweets suggest that the species is unsatisfied with its swamp dwelling existence.

ii). Whilst the research team recognises that commentary can be a worthwhile activity, it is to be noted that continuous commentary on the lonesome activities that make up the existence of the Continual Commentator is banal and offers little hope for improved evolutionary status.

The Convivial Communicator

i). The relatively high percentage of tweets that are part of/or result in a conversation is evidence of the ongoing evolutionary success of Convivial Commentators.

ii). The regular RTing of other similar species’ tweets is evidence of an interest in others, which in turn will lead to respect and reciprocation from the benefactors of these RTs’.


a). Whilst the team appreciates that foraging in swamps is an unfortunate existence, it never the less encourages Continual Commentators not to spread this negativity.

b).  Were the Continual Commentator to consider communicating with others as the Convivial Communicator does, it might find that other species’ would allow them the opportunity to reside in a more benign environment than they currently occupy.

c).  The research team reminds all Continual Commentators to remember that in the old world talking to oneself was viewed as a sign of madness (in severe instances often resulting in incarceration in a mental institution).

Final part next week

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